30 Day Challenge Day 30
What changed this month, and what you hope will happen next month
30 Day Challenge Day 29
A Photo of Yourself
Decided to do something different than the norm and post of photo of myself without my face showing. I had no idea this photo was being taken until it was sent to me today. It made me smile.
30 Day Challenge Day 28
The Month You Were Happiest This Year and Why
Well, it’s only Feb 5, so I guess we should include months from 2011?
I had a bit of a strange year last year. I don’t know if I can pick a single month I was the happiest. I would have said January 2011 as a contender, but that doesn’t count in the past 12 months.
So, I guess I would go with September. Maybe late August - September. When things with Anthony were new and I wasn’t scared and we were going out until all hours and getting to know each other and Fake Prom. I was pretty happy around that time.
I mean, so far, February is off to a better start than January, so I’m hoping that trend continues.
30 Day Challenge Day 27
Talk About Your Siblings
I have 3 sisters, 2 younger and 1 older. Yup. 4 girls in one family. Not a single brother.
Sophie is the baby, although hardly one anymore as she is 22. She is a crazy talented artist, I have a ton of her unwanted paintings hanging in my apartment. She’s also super independent and has been living on her own since she was 19. I mean, she has monetary support from our parents, but has no roommates. Sophie and I always fought the most growing up because we are both very similar. I used to think it was fun to provoke her and get in trouble. Isn’t that what older sisters do? But we’re both very stubborn and both had our angry angsty periods. She’s currently living in Montreal, although off to Italy and Paris for the next couple weeks.
Anna is the middle child, and my parents used to refer to her as the “hippie” child. I think this had to do with how she was always sort of off in her own world. She is still kind of flighty, sometimes when you talk to her you don’t know if she’s actually listening or just nodding without paying attention. She’s also a mad talented artist, and I have some of her work up at my place as well. She won’t admit it but she’s also the most hipster member of our family. She used to work at American Apparel and I think I learned what PBR was from her. She’s lived in both a loft in Brooklyn and a cabin in Dawson City. She’s going to have a lot of stories when she’s old. Right now she also lives in Montreal but there’s a chance she’s moving to Toronto soon.
Laura is my older sister. She’s also my half sis, so she’s 9 years older than me. We have the same dad, but I’ve always just considered her my sister, I just specify the half so people understand why there’s this big jump in age. She didn’t grow up with us, she lived with her mom (which is why I always feel like the oldest child), but she’d visit for Christmas and other holidays. She would send me cool cds for my birthday or christmas, and take me to see movies when I was a kid. She did all that cool older sister stuff that you want to do: she studied art, she cut her hair super short and back packed around Europe, she moved to Montreal. I used to visit her there when I was like 18 and 19. I feel bad that she was stuck trying to find fun things to do for her teenage sister. Now she and her boyfriend live in a house they bought together in Toronto and she’s expecting their first child. It’s actually the first time in my life that we live in the same city, so I’m pretty happy about that.
We’ve always gotten along really well. We bicker, I’ve thrown a marker at Sophie’s eye, we’ve smacked each other around, but we love each other. Also, and this is going to sound SO cocky, but we’re all also attractive ladies. It’s not like you could look at us and go “oh, she’s the ugly one”. Also, put us all together and suddenly the conversations turn into things my mother refers to as “bathroom talk”. My sister’s are crazy beautiful and talented and hilarious and I miss them when they’re not here!
This is the most recent photo I could find of us all together, from 2009. L to R: me, Sophie, Laura and Anna.
30 Day Challenge Day 25
10 Ways to Win Your Heart
- Make me laugh. I don’t care if it’s a cliché, but holy fuck, if I’m laughing, there is a greater chance that my pants might come off for you.
- Be sweet. I’m not asking for the moon or grand gestures all the time, but reminders that you care are great. Tell me I look beautiful - and mean it. Tell me you miss me when we don’t see each other for awhile. Don’t laugh at me when I open up to you.
- Be a gentleman. I’m a modern gal, but I like when guys do things that are vaguely chivalrous. Holding the door for me, offering to pay every now and then, and even as much as respecting me if I decide I don’t want to put out right away.
- Remember things. I don’t expect you to remember all the little details about me, but if I tell you something, don’t keep asking me because you weren’t listening.
- Let yourself be vulnerable. Let me see parts of you that you don’t normally share. Tell me your fears and dreams and hopes and if you do cry, I will be there for you and I will love you all the more for it. Just not all the time. I do enough of that already.
- Be honest. Pretty self explanatory.
- Don’t fuck with my head. Don’t play games. I’m not interested in the “three day rule”. If you want to text me, do it. If you want to see me, ask. I’ll tell you if you’re crossing a line. Don’t pretend you’re not into me so that I’ll be more into you. Don’t tell me you want to see other people just so you seem more desirable.
- Smile. Seriously. A good smile and a good laugh make me melt.
- Get along with my friends and family. Ultimately it’s my opinion that matters the most but you get bonus points if my friends and family like you too.
- Support me. Believe in me. Because a lot of the time, I don’t believe in myself.
30 Day Challenge Day 24
Things You Want to Say to 5 Different People
- I miss you. I’m not sure why we’re not friends anymore. The last few times we spoke, we were getting along. We apologized for the fights and we were working on our friendship again. And now, you won’t return my emails or texts, you deleted me from everything. It’s like I never existed in your life. Was it your girlfriend? Did she tell you to stop speaking to me? You were my best friend.
- You are another friend that I miss. Another friend who got a girlfriend and disappeared. I used to tell you everything, and vice versa. Now I have no idea what is happening in your life. Missing you too.
- I don’t want to pick a specific friend to write to to say I love them, I just want those that have not disappeared, those that have been around through it all, to know that I appreciate every single one of them. Whether it’s movie nights or drinking cheap beers at the Lakeview or brunches, you are all amazing.
- To my unborn niece or nephew: I am going to love you so hard, you’re going to explode. Can’t wait to meet you!
- You know everything I want to say. I’ve said it all before, I’ll say it over and over again.
30 Day Challenge Day 23
Something You Always Think ‘What If’ About
EVERYTHING.
But seriously, it boggles my brain how simple tiny decisions we make shape our lives. Like that movie with Gwyneth Paltrow, ‘Sliding Doors’. I was obsessed with that film for awhile because of the whole premise.
I mean, it can go back as far as “what if my Dad never met my Mom?” or as little as “what if I got up to pee right now?” “What if I had gone to a different university?” “What if my dad HAD moved us to Jersey?” I guess that’s why I have such a hard time making big life decisions. I am constantly worried I’ll put myself on the wrong path.
I know we’re not supposed to dwell on these things, and it’s not like I spend all day curled up in bed wondering why things are the way they are, but every now and then I do stop and think about it.
Life is crazy everyone. Madness.
30 Day Challenge Day 22
10 Things About You People Don’t Expect
- I have American citizenship. Well, dual citizenship to be exact. I was born in Canada (in Ottawa) but my father is American (from New Jersey). So I have a social security number, could apply for a US passport and could easily move to and work in the states without having to apply for a visa.
- Along with that, I spent 4 years living in Florida when I was a kid. We moved there when I was about 5 years old, to Dunedin (near Tampa). People always ask if it was much different there than Canada but honestly, I was a kid. I moved to Toronto when I was 9, so I don’t really think I was paying much attention to the political climate or anything like that. I remember it was much warmer there, and more snakes. And old people. I haven’t been back since I was 15, but I’d be curious to go again one day.
- I’m half Jewish. Technically, not Jewish at all since my dad is the one who’s Jewish, but for some reason people always find it surprising. Not sure why.
- Even though Esther is a Jewish name and my father is Jewish, I was actually named for my maternal grandmother, whose middle name is Esther, but who is Christian.
- That my eyes are really as blue as they come off in photos. Or just in general. Is this a cocky thing to say? I’ve had them compared to Liz Taylor which is mind boggling to me because I don’t think they’re THAT crazy (a woman at work used to exclusively call me “Liz” for this reason which eventually evolved to “Cleo” because Ms Taylor played Cleopatra and I had the bangs. Anyway, tangent)
- I’m a lot more flat chested than people think. This is an overshare, oh well. Ever seen Keira Knightley topless? Yeah, basically like that. But I’ve been wearing padded bras since high school, so I no one ever believes me when I tell them I’m flat. Until they see me braless/topless/in a sports bra. It used to make me really self conscious, but then I realized I could get away with wearing things that my bustier lady friends can’t (low cut v-necks are no sweat for me) and that most guys don’t seem to care. It does help that I have an ass that makes up for it.
- Up until the spring, I HATED cats. Now I can’t imagine not having mine. Except right now she’s going bat shit crazy and driving me nuts.
- I play guitar. I don’t play it well, but I do have a pretty nice acoustic and used to to take lessons in high school. It’s a GREAT way to impress boys. I have an electric at my parents but I’ve never had the space to have it in my apartments.
- I am a Redditor. Been reading for a couple years, joined over a year ago. I’m not a frequent poster but I will respond to comments and post pics of my cat every now and then. My last two boyfriends have also been big into Reddit so there’s been much bonding over memes and gifs.
- How much hair I have. I have very thick hair, and I shed. Everywhere. As anyone who has spent time living with me or had me stay over, they can attest to how much hair I lose in a single day, but how little it affects my head. Hair dressers ALWAYS make the same comments. There’s a lot of it, and every strand is thick.
30 Day Challenge Day 20
The Last Argument You Had
Hmm, probably with Anthony. With all the talking we’ve been doing, a lot of it has been arguing. A lot of it has been me learning to swallow my pride and admit I messed up, and some of it has been hearing things about myself I didn’t to hear.
Otherwise, things have been pretty argument free. I can’t even get Justin to respond to my messages to argue about why he no longer speaks to me. I guess I argued with Andrew when he tried to take my phone from me last week. I guess I argue with Danielle at work sometimes when she doesn’t agree with my life choices.
I mean, these are mostly little arguments. I’m stubborn, I want people to see things my way, and if they don’t, I will fight to the death about it.
But when it comes to big confrontations, I generally shy away from them.
